A Letter to My 14 Year-Old Self

Dear Little Julia,

Dear God do I have some wise words to share with you. But first, just to clarify something, you’re so not as tough as you think you are. So stop acting it. You are a young, naïve, and fragile pre-teen- it’s OK to break down your walls a little and let people see your soft side! And it’s important to remember that no one should ever be allowed to make you feel like less of a person when you do.

Now, on the topic of “acting tough,” let’s discuss how you shouldn’t ever wear anything that you have in your closet right now- like ever again. Those big bulky DC shoes? Yeah throw those suckers in the trash because you look like a clown. That super tight hot pink t-shirt you bought from Hot Topic? Trash. And don’t even get me started on those blood red tight skinny jeans. Ugh. The only thing I will applaud you on was your stellar pink hair. Although it was a little aggressive for a 14 year-old, it was still pretty cool. Also black nails are still cool, even though they’re now more chic and less punk.

Moving on. Here is a list of six important lessons I have learned over the past six years. Buckle up.

  1. It’s so typical of me to talk about this, but it has to be said. You know that boy who you thought you loved and couldn’t live without? Well, turns out he was never worth even a second of your time. You are the prize and any boy who doesn’t make you feel like that is a loser. Also, remember that you are young! Although it’s tough with all those raging hormones and crap, try to focus on yourself- you deserve it! Focus on your school work, get those good grades and become a strong and independent woman! You don’t need no man!
  2. Remember all of those hours you spent worrying about how all the other kids at school thought of you? Remember how you didn’t join those clubs and participate in those activities because you were afraid you would be seen as “un-cool”? Big mistake! The people who stand out and who aren’t afraid to go against the crowd usually end up becoming the most successful. Being popular and well-liked is always a good feeling, but it’s not the most important thing you should focus on.
  3. So you’ve just begun your freshmen year of high-school and grades don’t really matter that much yet, right? WRONG. The minute you step into high-school you’ve started on your journey towards getting accepted into college. Those math grades actually do matter and that AP class you turned down could have actually saved you a lot of time and money in the future. Stay focused in school and work on getting the best grades possible to keep your GPA up. (If you didn’t almost fail 9th grade algebra you probably would have gotten a better scholarship to Bonaventure and you wouldn’t be in so much student debt. Just sayin).
  4. Listen to your mother. She is right about LITERALLY everything. You may think that most of the time she’s working against you, but in actuality she’s just trying to help you out. Also, just give up on ever trying hiding anything from her because she will find out. Every time. Guaranteed.
  5. Talk to people. A lot of people. Just because someone isn’t on the same sports team as you or doesn’t join the same clubs you do, doesn’t mean you can’t be friends. It’s good to have variety in your life, otherwise it gets boring.
  6. Lastly, don’t be afraid to be yourself! Why would you waste any time pretending to be someone else? The sooner you figure that out, the better. If the friends you have right now don’t appreciate you the way you were born then ditch those bitches and find a better friend group. Simple as that.

In conclusion, little Julia, keep your head up because life does actually get better. Everyone is going through a rough time at 14. You’re not the only one. Fight your way through those mean boys and evil girls. Embrace the fact that your body is currently being pumped with hormones and take control of it. You are a strong girl; you can do this! Also, for the love of God develop a new fashion sense.

Love your older and much prettier self,

Older  Julia

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